Birthdays

Our older son is the kind of child who wishes away birthday pomp and circumstance. However, our younger son's birthday is fast approaching, and he wants a party.

Sigh.

I'm thinking of my fellow parents as I dread the task of planning this celebration.

I'm thinking of the parents of the child who stands alone on the crowded playground.

I'm thinking of the parents of the child who doesn't say the "right" things, who stands too close to others and who misses social cues.

I'm thinking of the parents of the child who wants to celebrate his birthday just like every other child but who has no friends to sit around a cake.

I know many of these parents. In fact, I'm one of them. Pulling off birthday celebrations is a Herculean effort, an effort born of love and driven by sheer determination.

In years past, our younger son's parties have happened out of the kindness of friends--friends who have offered their children as warm bodies to sit at a table and sing "Happy Birthday" to him when it was his turn to blow out those candles.

I've had years where I've tried to ignore that the day is coming, and my friends have pushed me to act.

I've had years where I've sent out invitations, each with a silent prayer that someone will respond favorably...this year was one of those years.

Truthfully, our son, overcome with anxiety from the environment of his school placement has barely spent any time in his classroom since the Christmas holiday. And yet, he wanted to invite his classmates to his party.

My stomach hurt.

Every year, he has his party on opening day at our local amusement park. What to do? Pad the invitation list, inconvenience my friends and end up inviting the entire world in the hopes that someone will show up to this party?

Or, do we take the plunge? Do we cut those apron strings from my friends and go for it? After all, I thought, he sees my friend's kids just once a year...when they come to sing to him on his birthday.


This year, I decided to do it. I sent out electronic invitations to five strangers, parents I didn't know, to see if they'd let their kids that I didn't know to come to our son's birthday party. Our son, the one who spends no time in their children's classroom at school.

Please, someone. Please say "yes".

A day went by. No answer. Two days went by. One person said "No". Three days went by, no answer. Four days went by, no answer still.

Please, I beg. Please. Someone please say, "yes".

I'll admit. I was in a panic every day. I regretted my decision. In an effort to provide a typical experience for our son, in an effort to let him spread his wings and fly, I was afraid that I set him up to fail.

And, then it arrived: a response in my email account.

It said "yes"!

Yes! Yes! My new favorite word! Thank you, oh thank you, parent that I don't know! Thank you for that "yes"!!! After that "yes" came a second from another classmate, and a third from a longtime friend who hasn't missed one of his parties since preschool.

Three friends, legitimate party-goers, are attending this party, and, while there may or may not be more attendees, I can't help but stand in a place of complete gratitude.


******************

Visit MorgueFile for your blogging photographic needs--free of charge and free for public use.